This has been a time of really figuring out who we’re truly closest with, and seeking those people out before all others. It’s also been interesting to see how my mood has changed now that I’m not interacting with the people that leave me feeling more drained than built up. It feels good. It’s encouraged me to seek out more of the bucket-filling people when this crisis is over. There have been great women that I’ve met in the last few years that I didn’t get to interact with on more than an acquaintance level because my friendship plate was all filled up — and maybe not in the most balanced way. Just like the USDA encourages us to fill our plates with more healthy foods than unhealthy ones, when things go back to “normal,” I want to be intentional about making more room at the friendship buffet for the delicious Mongolian beef, and leave the overly greasy noodles that always end up making me mildly nauseous far behind.
Coronavirus has been somewhat of a reset for the world. Air quality is better, in some areas, than it has been in years. The animals are feeling it, too. Without the stress of constant human observation, pandas at the Ocean Park Zoo in Hong Kong have successfully mated for the first time in 10 years. And, the best of humanity shines in the way we’ve been looking out for our friends and neighbors.
And there it is, I guess. My conflicted feelings come from my own personal reset. I have loved having more time to love my babies at their best and not only when they’re depleted. I have loved feeling more available for my husband. I have loved being forced to slow down and to be given a break from the mental load of living life. The challenge for all of us will be to take the things that we’ve learned from this forced reset and apply them to life in the “real world.”
I want to say “no” more often. I want to sit on the couch and read with my kids around me — something that looks like “doing nothing” but turns out to be everything. Everything that truly matters, that is. Always one to lean towards the sentimental, I feel pulled to it even more now, as I’m confronted with the fragility of life as we know it. The most precious things to me are the ones right within my reach, and I am so grateful that I’ve gotten this time to hold them tighter.